A chiefly British derogatory term, literally meaning "one who masturbates," but properly used to describe anyone who is either incompetent, supercilious, or otherwise generally unpleasant. Tosser is a British synonym to the primarily American derogatory term, jerkoff, which is also used in the same manner as wanker and tosser.
Joe Sixpack: I'm going to need you to come in for work on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year's, all without overtime pay.
Jolly Roger: Don't be such a tosser. I'm going to the pub with my mates on those days!
Jolly Roger: Don't be such a tosser. I'm going to the pub with my mates on those days!
by FoxWing Mabon-Tail December 15, 2008
a tosser is similar to a wanker, well, its really exactly the same. tossing and wanking are both different words for masterbation. if you dont know what any of those words mean, dont use them.
by king_jimmy August 21, 2005
as above but more like wanker than dickhead, as the toss in tosser refers to the tossing motion of masterbation (or tossing-off). A tosser is someone who masterbates.
by tonguestubble August 16, 2005
by red_man May 29, 2014
A polite way of calling somone a cunt, best used in mixed company or in front of your mother to avoid a clip around the ear hole.
Said Bob to Fred "You're a tosser".
Bob really thnks Fred is a cunt, but his mother was in the room.
Bob really thnks Fred is a cunt, but his mother was in the room.
by Dick Splash September 13, 2003
A fan of title of show the off-Broadway and then Broadway musical, whose run was tragically cut short.
Maybe if the "theater fans" who see Wicked every week could branch out a little, truly meaningful, creative ART would be able to survive over the fluffy jank that fills Broadway today.
RIP tos.
Maybe if the "theater fans" who see Wicked every week could branch out a little, truly meaningful, creative ART would be able to survive over the fluffy jank that fills Broadway today.
RIP tos.
by dannytravers81 April 23, 2009
A word often used to describe someone who likes to masturbate more often than is considered normal or a word that is often used to describe someone who is being, quite simply, a prick.
Neil: Ah, Fred. I see thy has a couple o' packs o' fags on tha' lap.
Fred: Aye?
Neil: Lend us one, cock.
Fred: Not today, cock. Thy'll have to get thy own.
Neil: Tha's nowt but a tosser.
OR
Neil: How many times has thy tossed off today, Fred?
Fred: Twenty, twenty-one. Why, cock?
Neil: 'Cause tha's nowt but a tosser.
Fred: Aye?
Neil: Lend us one, cock.
Fred: Not today, cock. Thy'll have to get thy own.
Neil: Tha's nowt but a tosser.
OR
Neil: How many times has thy tossed off today, Fred?
Fred: Twenty, twenty-one. Why, cock?
Neil: 'Cause tha's nowt but a tosser.
by Kenny Cartter July 11, 2008